Like most of us I’m looking for the sort of job where people give me money for no clear reason. So I have a couple web sites that send me their comic attempts at locating jobs and I think in seven years of having them set up none has ever sent me anything remotely plausible. But today I hit a grand new one. It’s for a “Specialist Sputtering Engineer”, in Singapore.
I never realized sputtering was the sort of thing needing engineering. I thought it just came from trying to get your point across with more exasperation and less time than you really need. Alas, I know I’m not qualified. I sputter only very rarely. If they needed a stammering engineer I’d be set. I don’t mean to brag but I can stammer even before I’ve really woken up for the day.
So if you know anyone looking for a world-class stammering engineer — freelance or fulltime — please let me know care of the address. Any address will do. I don’t know that I can qualify for a specialist stammering engineer right off the bat. But there’s probably some online certification I could get for it if I knew there was demand.
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Sputtering?! Damn… that leaves me out too… 😦
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Yeah. This is why we can’t have a middle class, you know.
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I saw a ‘spattering’ engineer once in Bangkok – some guy whose protective gear consisted of shorts, using a gas-axe to cut up steel. He managed it by holding the torch at arm’s length and closing his eyes, keeping himself reasonably clear of the spatter, leaving me to conclude that Thai workplace safety laws are not the same as those of New Zealand.
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That’s astounding. I do remember feeling similarly about some of the workplace environs I saw in Singapore, compared to the United States. In hindsight I think I was just too easily spooked by seeing bamboo structures instead of steel and more familiar wood being used, though.
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