How-To: Make A List

  1. Select a topic.
  2. Write down a bunch of numbers, or maybe letters if you like those as indices better.
  3. Reconsider whether you should’ve picked another topic.
  4. No, no, the first one’s fine.
  5. Put something on the list.
  6. Put another thing on the list.
  7. Put something on the list that you can cross right out, for a feeling of better accomplishment.
  8. Find something that doesn’t really belong on the list, don’t put it on.
  9. Put something on the list just to show you still can.
  10. Find something that doesn’t really belong on the list, do put it on to show the list who’s in charge.
  11. Add something to get to a nice round number like twelve items.
  12. Maybe have no idea but add something to the list because a list with an odd number of things seems so freakishly wrong unless the number is five.
  13. Remember that thing that was going to be on the list but you forgot to add it earlier, possibly because you were in the shower and that helped you think of it.

Another Blog, Meanwhile Index

The Another Blog, Meanwhile index rose seven points to 106 today, surprising everybody. Coincidentally the rival Another Blog, Meanwhile index started by those dissidents also rose by seven points, resulting in accusations of plagiarism and poor sportsmanship. The rival index’s sponsors say this was just another coincidence and they’re sure that as different views on the fundamentals develop we’ll see more divergence between the indices, by which they mean any at all.


Author: Joseph Nebus

I was born 198 years to the day after Johnny Appleseed. The differences between us do not end there. He/him.

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