So given that the International House of Pancakes we went to over the weekend saw these phenomena:
- They were “out” of crepes, a thing made on-demand from eggs, milk, and butter.
- They could not split a check between three people at the table because, the server told us, that old policy made it too easy for dine-and-dashers.
- According to the sign at the register they no longer sold gift cards by credit or debit card but by cash only.
- The server asked us for advice on where in the area to buy a new SD card for his phone because apparently he took it in for servicing and they swiped his old bigger card for a smaller one.
- The server also talked to us a bit about how his phone’s news app normally required him to log in to stream any programs but for the inauguration it didn’t.
- Another sign at the register asked for comments to be sent to an address at Yahoo that had number in the user name.
So check me on this: there’s, like, at most a four percent chance we were at a legitimate IHOP and we were really at some weirdly elaborate counterfeit, right?
In short: always go to pancake places late nights on the weekends. You’re missing something otherwise.