Today’s Complete Distraction Comes To Us From The Beverage Division


So then I had to get this.

Me holding up a two-liter bottle of the solid blue-colored Diet Faygo Arctic Sun. The logo has a strongly mid-80s graphic design style of blue letters for 'Faygo' and 'Arctic Sun', a green script 'Diet', and lemon-yellow radial streaks centered on the words 'Arctic Sun'. The background is some souvenirs from amusement parks, including Canobie Lake Park.
I know you may be distracted by that window ornament in the background for Canobie Lake Park. It’s an amusement park in the town of Salem, New Hampshire, and if you find yourself in New England for some reason I recommend visiting the place. I mean, they’ve even got a Caterpillar ride, with the retractable canvas cover, and do you know where else you can find one of those? In the year 1938 and that’s about it.

I know, I can feel how excited you are too. There’s several great reasons to. For one, it allows me to finally truthfully increment my lifetime count of “blue fluids consumed”. For another, “Diet Faygo Arctic Sun” sounds exactly like the sort of thing that Zippy the Pinhead would start chanting for three, maybe four panels straight while standing near miscellaneous roadside attractions. It’s something that just keeps on giving.

Author: Joseph Nebus

I was born 198 years to the day after Johnny Appleseed. The differences between us do not end there. He/him.

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