In Which I Address Your Questions Regarding My Ziggy Christmas Ornament


  1. Yes, I own a Ziggy Christmas ornament.
  2. No, I am not joking.
  3. No, I did not get it ironically. If I am not mistaken I got this in 1977 or 1978 and President Jimmy Carter only deregulated irony in 1979.
  4. Yes, I hang it on the tree.
  5. Every year except when I forget.
  6. Yes, somehow however I hang the Ziggy ornament it turns around to face the wall.
  7. Yes, I have spent more than fifteen minutes trying to get Ziggy to not face the wall.
  8. No, I am not sure that I’m not the one with the problem, what with how I don’t respect how facing the wall is part of the Nature of Ziggy.
  9. No, but really, isn’t not respecting the Nature of Ziggy the truest possible way to respect the Nature of Ziggy?
  10. No, it is not.
Small Christmas ornament of Ziggy, wearing a striped scarf and holding his dog, hanging from a tree and facing the wall.
So some mathematicians investigated why you have some ornaments and ribbons and stuff like that which twist to the wrong way around no matter how you hang them and after eighteen months of investigation they concluded: yeah we dunno, it’s weird how that just happens for some stuff. By the way, not to brag or anything, but check out the high-quality Art of the colors all over that wall there. Honestly the whole picture is a high-quality mix of colors put together.

Author: Joseph Nebus

I was born 198 years to the day after Johnny Appleseed. The differences between us do not end there. He/him.

2 thoughts on “In Which I Address Your Questions Regarding My Ziggy Christmas Ornament”

    1. Heh. Neither pants nor shoes, no. But he is in a bathrobe and wearing a stocking cap. So pants would be overdressing. It’s a little odd he doesn’t have slippers on, but some folks have warm feet, I have to suppose.

      Or … hm. Maybe it’s just a really wide scarf he’s wearing, since he seems to have it wrapped around his dog too. All right, I don’t know what he’s wearing, but pants and shoes are definitely not it.

      Like

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