Statistics Saturday: The Flawed Nature Of Movies, Using _Gnomeo and Juliet_ As The Yardstick


A note on methodology. Movies are compared based on the number of Goofs recorded at the Internet Movie Database. Goofs listed as “character error” or “incorrectly regarded as goofs” are deducted from the total. The reason for not counting the second kind of goof is that goofs which are not goofs should not be counted as goofs. Please sit down and hold your head in your hands until dizziness from that last sentence passes. The reason for not counting the first kind of goof is that fictional characters are permitted to be mistaken about things, unlike real people.

Apollo 13, 70.5; Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow, 21; Harry and the Hendersons, 6; Kramer vs Kramer, 13; Bedknobs and Broomsticks, 11; The New Wizard of Oz (1914), 0.5; Some Kind of Wonderful, 6.5; Countdown (1967), 3.5; Cool Runnings, 13; Weird Science, 16; Hot to Trot, 0; The Longest Day, 37; Deep Impact, 37; Brewster’s Millions (1985), 4.5; Nothing In Common, 1; Meteor (1979), 12; Outrageous Fortune, 5; Face/Off, 73; Fletch Lives, 5.5; Racing Stripes, 4
Yes, the lone unflawed film in all of moviemaking history is 1988’s Hot To Trot, the gripping story of how John Candy is a talking horse who can give good horse-racing tips. I assume his character was killed and reincarnated as a horse. Why else would a talent like John Candy’s be the voice of a horse? I don’t remember the movie really. Wouldn’t it be a kick if in the original script John Candy is a talking horse who gives good stock-market tips, but the studio worried that was too confusing a storyline and wanted it simplified to horse-racing tips? Anyway, yes, Hot To Trot, the lone flawless movie ever produced, other than The Bed Sitting Room (1969). Also Running Brave (1983). The Reluctant Dragon (1941) has no reported goofs but does include Goofy and is therefore unclassifiable.

Reference: Computers in Spaceflight: The NASA Experience, James E. Tomayko.

Oh yeah also Kidco (1984) and Dr Otto and the Riddle of the Gloom Beam (1985) contain no known goofs.

Author: Joseph Nebus

I was born 198 years to the day after Johnny Appleseed. The differences between us do not end there. He/him.

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