Not to Name Names

I was struck with a bizarre fact about the young me. Like, younger than middle-school me. When I was in early elementary school — before even Laverne, on Laverne and Shirley, had gotten her job at that aerospace company — we were expected to bring valentines for everyone else in our class. And I did that too. Thing is that means I knew the names and faces of everybody in my class. That’s like thirty people and I kept them all straight. I couldn’t name thirty people today, much less match their names with their faces, even if you spotted me the core cast of Peanuts.

They must have sent home ditto sheets with everyone’s name on it, right? That’s the only way this sort of makes sense. But then how did I get cards to everybody correctly? Maybe I didn’t, and everybody I messed up was trying to get mad at me, but they weren’t sure who I was? And maybe, like, they got mad at Michael Bellaran instead? Well, if that’s what happened, Michael, I’m sorry. I’d make up for it by buying you lunch if I ever see you. But that’s going to depend on you recognizing me. Sorry.


Author: Joseph Nebus

I was born 198 years to the day after Johnny Appleseed. The differences between us do not end there. He/him.

3 thoughts on “Not to Name Names”

  1. Three quick responses so I don’t Bogart your comments section.

    Did you consult the City Hall Dragon about your voting record? She’s helped you in the past.

    I hope you and your Love had an acceptable V Day

    IIRC the way my school handled class V Day cards was everyone had construction paper heart covered shoe boxes on their desks and everyone just handed out store bought Vday
    Card slips of whatever was the current hit tv show that just had the FROM section filled out, so I assume if a similar process went on in your class you could handle it as long as you didn’t forget your own name.


    1. Aw, well, thank you. Don’t worry, though. I’m as lousy returning one comment as I am returning three.

      I have not been down to City Hall since … well, when I dropped off my application for an absentee ballot. Didn’t even get inside the building.

      Our Valentine’s Day came out all right, although I’ll admit we’ve had more fun ones. I hope you had a decent enough time of it.

      I do believe we had shoeboxes on the desks, and passed out little store-bought cards to everyone. I do not remember whether the boxes had people’s names on them or whether we were just … remembering … where everybody was. We did often get put in alphabetical order, which helps people who are very much into setting things in order.


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