Episodes of _Alice_ I still remember for some reason

Special thanks-I-guess to Thomas K Dye of Projection Edge and Newshounds web comic fame for getting me on this topic.

  • The one where the waitresses go out on strike and they explain that to be a legal picket line the people in it have to stay in motion at all times, although it’s probably okay if Vera gets on roller skates so she can just slide around, even though she doesn’t know how to stop or steer and she goes rolling off into … traffic, I guess? It seemed bad for her, anyway. I think her injuries shamed Mel into settling the strike. Anyway it’s a good lesson to not learn US labor law by watching Alice.
  • Flo leaves so she can start her own spinoff series, and she gets replaced with … uh … her cousin or maybe sister or someone who’s a lot like her except she doesn’t have that great “Kiss my grits” catchphrase to fall back on.
  • There’s definitely one where a wrecking ball smashes through the diner, right? I couldn’t be imagining that of all things?
  • There’s probably one where Alice’s kid gets to say No to having a Drug even though his bestest best friend forever who we never saw before or after is having them.
  • Mel sells the diner for the last episode so everybody has to go and achieve their lifelong dreams now and what do you know but they do.
  • I’m just guessing that there was one where a major character discovers like six seasons in that they never learned to read, so they learn now. But I don’t know for sure.

Not listed: the Saturday-morning cartoon spinoff of Alice which pop culture theory tells us ought to have existed. The most generally accepted hypotheses suppose that they would all be working their way around the world selling stuff from a funny Wienermobile-like contraption with astounding powers, possibly including flight and the ability to operate as a submarine, and meanwhile there’s spies after them for some reason. They might have a zany pet or it might just be Alice’s flying submersible Wienermobile has a talking computer.

And if I may bring things down with a little harsh reality here: how is it that every season of Alice has been released on DVD while only three-fifths of The Muppet Show have? Well? Huh? You know?

Reference: The Unknown Dominion: Canada and her People, Bruce Hutchison.

Author: Joseph Nebus

I was born 198 years to the day after Johnny Appleseed. The differences between us do not end there. He/him.

11 thoughts on “Episodes of _Alice_ I still remember for some reason”

  1. Don’t forget the very special episode where Marvin Kaplin and Arnold Stang are both convinced they play Henry the phone guy.

    And in non-Alice news we now seem to have a family of rabbits living under our deck.


    1. You know it’s true what they say–recalling Alice plots is like eating peanuts,you can’t stop at one, so here’s a couple more–
      George Burns stops in and Vera is convinced he’s really God.
      Art Carney stops in and has to be convinced to let Mel market his chilli as Chilli con Carney.


      1. You are right! With me, my Alice plot recall took six before I stopped.

        I’ll go along with Chili con Carney, although I would sincerely have thought George Burns had better things to do than prop up Alice, like recording some more Garcia y Vega cigar commercials or anything.


    2. I fear I have forgotten every other episode, however special. Which is a small shame since I’d generally like some Arnold Stang stuff.

      Great news for the rabbits, though, that’s happy to hear about.


        1. I apologize for not acknowledging this earlier but it was a great sequence. Young me would have been so annoyed that they were so busy clowning around they never got to the theoretical game. Older me is just happy to see these comedians and comic actors messing with each other.


  2. I remember there was one episode where Mel wondered why he had three waitresses in a diner that had maybe four tables. Or maybe that was a dream I had…


    1. I fully accept this as a potential episode! I don’t remember myself, since I really did go through all the episodes I could remember with this piece.

      I’d also accept as episodes:
      – Alice gets a side gig as a local tv chat show host but the time it takes threatens her waiting ability.
      – The gang finds a homeless guy living in the dumpster behind the diner and fixes his life by getting him back together with his ex.
      – Vera or someone goes to night school but studying threatens her waiting ability.
      – Guest-starring appearance from somebody who was in Report To Murphy that because of bad scheduling aired only after that show was cancelled.
      – They’re stuck in the freezer and only flashbacks to earlier episodes can save them.
      – Mel has a new girlfriend but this relationship threatens his diner-running ability.


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