Comic Strips I Just Don’t Have Enough Time In My Life To Spend Any Of It Reading


I know this is going to be my most controversial list ever but I must report what is true.

  1. Mallard Fillmore.
  2. Those Sunday Pearls Before Swine strips where it’s 40 panels of endless word balloons to set up the characters in the last panel telling the cartoonist he should get a real job instead of writing puns.
  3. Any strip trying to do the “Who’s On First” routine with band names that hasn’t noticed the whole premise crashes when you remember they’re The Who, and for that matter The Guess Who.
  4. Any strip doing its own version of I Am The Very Model Of The Modern Major-General. Also any non-comic-strip doing its own version of I Am The Very Model Of The Modern Major-General. We have all that we need for what we’ve been doing.
  5. Zack Hill.
  6. Any strip that’s zinging Modern Art and how it’s all these non-representational paintings and display fixtures that look like clutter.

Another Blog, Meanwhile Index

The index dropped four points in trading that just went to reinforce everyone arguing that everyone and everything is doomed and will never be any good again which, remember, was set off by people noticing this is the highest the Another Blog, Meanwhile index has ever been. It’s enough to make you wonder if there’s any gratitude in the world anymore or has it always been like this? Don’t answer, those who remember whether it’s been like this.

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Reasons We Sent Back The New HD DVR


So far:

  • Constant loud buzzing noise indicating swarm of cicadas located within.
  • Spontaneously resets and loses all programs, program guides, content, everything.
  • Growls, hisses when remote control used; insists on being petted.
  • Keeps fussing over whether specific commas in the program descriptions are necessary, or are merely good style, or could be dispensed with altogether.
  • Will not stop quoting dialogue from The Abbott and Costello Show while impersonating the wrong voices.
  • Has mismatched pair of gloves, somehow.
  • Tells jokes about how funny kinkshaming would be, if it were doing that, which it isn’t, but if it did, think how funny that would be.
  • Judges me for watching that show about the so-called Treasure Pit on Oak Island that totally exists, no, seriously.
  • Keeps asking my opinion about its His Dark Materials fanfic.
  • Is fine, but we sent it back anyway out of habit.
  • Spiky quills around the HDMI output.
  • Pops up messages asking yes-or-no questions with the option to answer “proceed”, “cancel”, and “ignore”.

On the bright side we’ve never been so close to having watched everything in our queue.   

Another Blog, Meanwhile Index

The index rose zero points today, which sounds better than saying it dropped zero points today. Except if you’re a really risk-adverse personality and prefer thinking that we dropped zero instead of that we gained zero. It’s a delicate balance of values, all of which are nothing.

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