Back To The Enterprise


Everybody's just kind of standing around their Space Pool Mini-Table.
This is from the Enterprise episode Breaking The Ice, in which the ship has ventured dozens of light-years beyond human space so everybody can romp on a comet. Yes, there’s snowman-building included and I’m not even making that up.

It’s not until you look back on a TV show like a decade later that you realize: “so, in the 22nd century we’re going to spend a lot of time reenacting Wings’s Back To The Egg album, then?”


That’s just a passing thought, so, here’s some others. My mathematics blog had another roundup of comic strips that seemed enough on point for it. It also includes links to a grammar strip and to a general teaching strip. I hope you like.

Caption This: From The Adventures Of Scotty In The 24th Century


Scott stands in front of the bright red door from the original Star Trek bridge. Well, a holodeck replica. You know how these things go.
From the Star Trek: The Next Generation episode “Relics”, in which a time-displaced Scotty feels lost, isolated, and depressed, and is visited by everybody in the cast except Deanna Troi, the ship’s professional counselor.

“Um, Scotty … there’s a handle. A handle. Just turn the … it’s … you have to put your hand out and … you just … ”


Or, well, a 24th century replica of the 23rd century, while he’s in the 24th century because … oh, look, it just makes sense if you see the episode, OK? Meanwhile if you have an idea what to do with this picture please share it! We’ve just got till the year 2369 or something to do something for the poor guy.

Caption This: Discovering How Aliens See Us


'Trip' Tucker and a silver-clad orange alien standing in a technicolor spider-web in space.
From the Star Trek: Enterprise episode “Unexpected”, when the show ventured into any MTv music video circa 1982.

“So, is it true your people learned everything about humans from watching the Sid and Marty Krofft Supershow?”


(And as before, I’m interested what you kind folks make of this scene.)

Caption This: From the first season of Star Trek Enterprise


Two Andorians hold phase pistols on the regulars while T'Pol's head pops up into view.
In the episode The Andorian Incident, the crazy paranoid overly suspicious Andorians think there’s a secret spy base inside a Vulcan Space Monastery. They’re right, but can only prove this by the traditional method of getting anything done on Star Trek: Enterprise, which is punching Captain Archer over and over and over. Which is fine with everyone.

What really enraged the Andorians was the relentless Vulcan campaign of photobombing.


(I’m interested what other folks might make of this, especially given that lovely woodwork in the Vulcan Space Monastery.)

When We All Stopped Watching Deep Space Nine


Before I get into this, a couple days ago my mathematics blog had another group of comic strips to talk about. I like that sort of talk and I hope you’ll at least give it a read and see whether you like it too. That done, remember like 1992 when we tried out watching Deep Space Nine? Remember that we stopped, but not why? Here’s why. It’s an episode called “Move Along Home”, when a flock of tabletop gamers from the Gamma Quadrant invaded the station. Anyway, here’s what you missed from that episode, if you didn’t watch it in the first place:

In a foggy room Deep Space Nine's Commander Sisko takes a swig of a vaguely orange drink.
They’re from a different quadrant, that’s why they buy their party glasses from the dollar store.

A daring choice at the Stardate 46600 Sommelier Competition as Commander Sisko decides to pair a Denebian coq au vin with a tall glass of Strawberry Fanta Zero.

Deep Space Nine's Major Kira stares into the wide-open mouth of some guy with different face markings from the usual.
Crow: Uvula?
Tom Servo: No, I went to William and Mary, actually.

“The little dangly thing at the back of your throat has a smiley face on it.”

The Deep Space Nine crew bangs at one of those diamond-shaped space doors while a kid plays hopscotch without them.
If you’re not sure whether you remember the episode, see if this is still in your head: “Allamaraine, count to four, allamaraine, then three more, allamaraine, if you can see, allamaraine, you’ll come with me,” and then repeat that for thirty-five minutes before the characters catch on.

“Oh, please open up, Family Feud door, that we may compete against the stars of the hit CBS sitcom Dave’s World!

And that’s about it, except that the episode was — really! — nominated for an Emmy Award for Outstanding Individual Achievement in Hairstyling for a Series. Which is an actual thing, which is kind of wonderful.

Oh, also, just yesterday I had another bunch of mathematically-themed comic strips so if you wanted to read about those too I’d be glad. Thank you.

Mathematics Comics and Star Trek


My mathematics blog had another roundup of comic strips yesterday, so I hope you’ll consider going over and reading them, even if I don’t have any pictures from the comics on hand there. (There’s links for each to Gocomics.com, which I believe is a reliably stable archival source for the strips, which is why I don’t include images.) Since that’s not particularly visual, then, let me give you my thought about a scene from the third episode of Star Trek: Enterprise.

Several folks in Star Fleet jumpsuits wandering around in a field, as seen from high above, because this was early enough in the show they could afford crane and helicopter shots still.
The actors on Star Trek: Enterprise want to know if they’re finally allowed back in the studio now?

Jean-Luc Picard’s Blow-Up.

Caption This: From The Series Premiere Of Enterprise


Plastic models from the premiere episode of Star Trek: Enterprise.
Curiously, nobody would complain about the acting being wooden.

“Man, Enterprise in HDTV is a ripoff.”


Meanwhile, at the risk of overloading you good folks with this sort of thing, my mathematics blog had another roundup of comic strips, plus a Jumble puzzle, for which one of the words is “DEVOUT”.

Caption This: Getting 80% Of All Voyager Episodes Done


Janeway is leaning forward in front of her 24th-century lost-in-the-delta-quadrant couch.
A still from the Star Trek: Voyagers episode “Hunted”, which I never saw either. I think.

Janeway: “Blah, blah, something, something, coffee, blah blah, tachyon pulse something deflector array, reset button. Done. Next?”

Credits: Special thanks to Jason Brose who had the caption idea right.

Caption This: With Spock On Romulus


Spock busy looking way too dignified to be in this episode, and staring at a Romulan who's just got the most unfortunate grin on his face.
Ambassador Spock, Romulan Senator Pardek, and somebody wearing a shower curtain standing around the Who Would Buy This aisle at Bed, Bath, and Beyond.

Romulan Guy In The Middle: “Ambassador Spock, may I at last present you with the face I have brought you halfway across the galaxy to punch.”

Spock: “I regard punching this face as a solemn duty and a service to the galaxy.”


Yeah, it’s a quick little thing, but in my defense, I’m tired after writing about another bunch of comic strips that mention mathematical themes, in which I explain how they’re doing things that are perfectly funny if you understand them well enough. Also, hey, I reached 15,000 page views over the past day, which is a nice fairly round number. Hi, gang.

Meanwhile, at the Trial of the 23rd Century


Doctor McCoy holding a Klingon translator up to his ear and looking shaken.
And one more time: this Captain Kirk isn’t small, he’s far away. Small … far away. Got it?

McCoy: “Jim? Is your translator thingamabob licking your ear, too?”

And Commander Data Tries Out Something Else Wrong


Data holds Riker by the chin in the famous 'smooth as an android's bottom' scene that always gets on the Top 100 Moments From The Last Two Star Trek: The Next Generation Movies lists.
Both characters hope if they’re very quiet then Star Trek: Insurrection will get bored and go away and they can be in a more interesting movie. Unluckily, they got Nemesis instead.

Riker: “No, this isn’t how wrist puppets work, Data.”

On New Year’s Eve In The 24th Century …


Riker, Data, LaForge, and an unidentified other person stand amongst evidence of horseplay on the SS Tsiolkovsky.
Screen cap from “The Naked Now”, as served by TrekCore.com’s image galleries. If you don’t remember the episode, it’s the one that introduced “fully functional” to the description of Data’s abilities.

Riker: “It appears this crew has been in an all-out fight for their right to party.”

Did I Mention We’re Beaming You Into Beirut?


Tasha Yar, Worf, and two people we never saw before are dressed in shiny blue spandex.
You know, I don’t think I’ve ever actually watched a movie in which “saving the neighborhood rec center” is the plot.

“If our historical databanks about the 1980s are any good, you’re going to fit in perfectly down there. Now go save that neighborhood rec center!”

Fun Activity Puzzle Time!


Can you spot the winner of Cheerios’s “Win An Appearance On Star Trek: The Next Generation” contest in this picture?

Tasha Yar, Worf, and two people we never saw before are dressed in shiny blue spandex.
Yes, I am being needlessly mean to a person who’s never done me the slightest conceivable harm, apart from playing Sela Yar.

Answer: It’s Denise Crosby!

On The Next Thrilling Episode Of Star Trek: The Next Generation


Tasha Yar, Worf, and two people we never saw before are dressed in shiny blue spandex.
A scene from The Next Generation‘s episode “11001001” in which nobody feels compelled to wear their leotards backwards.

Riker: “Have fun being that Devo tribute band!”

Meanwhile, On A Bad Star Trek: Voyager Episode


Mutated lizard-man Tom Paris wears jammies and kidnaps Captain Janeway, because this made sense in context.
Screen capture from “Threshold”, which is a legendarily awful Star Trek: Voyager episode, and shut up, fans can too tell. And yeah, it’s pretty bad, but in its defense, it’s gloriously bad instead of being just boring.

Mutated Lizard-Man Tom Paris ponders, “You know, I thought this would make me happy for sure.”

Meanwhile, In Space …


Scott and Spock inside the Jeffries tube; Kirk somewhere far below.
I’m not actually sure which episode of Star Trek this is from, which would have brought intense shame to the 16-year-old me.

“What do you mean Engineering is voting to secede from the Enterprise?!”

“Furthermore, Captain, Mister Scott has requested that I inform you that he is no longer speaking to you.”

“Is this about stealing lines again? Because I keep explaining, I’m only thinking of the best interests of the show, that’s why!”