Statistics Saturday: Things Found In The ‘Cans And Bottles’ Recycling Bin


  • Styrofoam coffee cup
  • Cherry Coke Zero can
  • Paper coffee cup, half-cup of tea
  • Banana peel
  • Four-day-old newspaper
  • Dr Pepper Cherry Vanilla bottle
  • Bundle of plastic wrapped around itself
  • Oatmeal cookie
  • Paperclip
  • Snow
  • Unmailed, unaddressed Christmas card envelope torn open
  • Sprite Zero Cranberry can

Another Blog, Meanwhile Index

Analysts say the Another Blog, Meanwhile index was unchanged today because what started out as a casual staring contest turned into a who-can-stay-quiet-the-longest contest, and from there it was a short step to a who-can-hold-their-breath-the-longest contest. In all the contesting nobody got around to doing any trading. No, nobody held their breath long enough to pass out and we’re getting to think that isn’t a thing that can actually happen.

121

Simply Having


If the Christmas season this year taught me one thing, it’s that the Christmas music channels on those oddball extremely high-numbered channels on the cable box have way more covers of Paul McCartney’s “Wonderful Christmastime” than I thought. I bet if you piled them up there’s easily five versions of that song out there. I wouldn’t have imagined there were more than three, tops.

If the season taught me two things, it’s that “Wonderful Christmastime” cover thing and that I was wise to buy physically smaller cards to send out to people this year. I had much less space to write to everybody on my list and so I was able to finish much more quickly, and without ever running into a sentence that made it clear I’ve forgotten how to make a capital “G” in cursive. Next year I’m going to have to see if they have even smaller cards yet, maybe something the size of a Tic Tac wrapper, with a fox or a squirrel on the front because foxes and squirrels are on the front of every Christmas card suddenly, and I’ll be able to write heartfelt messages like, “Dea M, Hpe this yr, Lv, J” and I can be done with all the card-writing before I remember to dread it.

If the season taught me three things, it’s that count of “Wonderful Christmastime” covers thing, the smaller-card thing, and that while I can eat my body weight in cookies and artichoke dip in a mere thirty-two hours, that’s not something I should be bragging about so please don’t tell anyone you heard I could do it. But I totally can.

I don’t even want to think about what four things might have been.

Statistics Saturday: How Much I Think About Getting Address Labels


There's sharp peaks in the Christmas-card-writing season and the thank-you-card-writing seasons.
A chart of how much I think about getting address labels versus time. I never get address labels. I should. I interact with businesses that seem like they’d be ones to give out address labels. I don’t know what happens to them.