Reconsidering Penguins


OK, first, I stand by my Statistics Saturday post about the nations of the world as you find them in amusement park figures and art.

But on Saturday, after I’d had it scheduled to post, and while I was out waiting behind someone who was trying to figure out how to work a Coke Freestyle machine, I realized something. “Santa Claus” is a funny nation. “Penguins” make for a funny nation. But “The Santa Claus-Penguinarian Empire”? That would be much better. And from a start like that I could play on all kinds of Austro-Hungarian Empire jokes that readers would love.

Too late now, that’s all. Pity. Someday I’ll have my second thoughts when it’s not too late to do anything with them.

Why People Just Stop Talking To Me Until I Wind Down


One friend: “Saturdays are usually busy for me.”

Me: “What with?”

That friend: “It varies, but usually trails or volunteering related.”

Other friend: “You volunteer to be a trail?”

Me: “She was always prone to letting people walk all over her.”

(Correctly, no one laughs.)

Me: “She tried sitting up, but they fell off.”

(And everyone is silent until I remember that just because a sentence appears in my mind that’s no reason I have to put it out where anybody else has to live through it.)